I've been pondering sanctification lately, the process of becoming more christlike and shedding our old selves. This concept has been rather nebulous to me, but I read an article over break about what the will is metaphysically. I believe Eleanore Stump wrote that the will is changed as we submit it to God and sanctification is the process of this change. I have heard similar ideas before and while the idea is nothing new, it's been one of my back-thoughts for a while. It does seem that God changes my will as I bend it over to him. Recently I have been praying that God would change my heart in specific areas even though I know I will not change my behavior on my own. Through very little effort on my part I am amazed to see God transforming me. However, today was one of those days where I was reminded of how easy it is for me to slip back into anger and completely ignore the bigger picture. As I was ranting to myself and half-praying, I was reminded that 'sanctification days' are really great blessings. I am so grateful that God does not leave me where I am but put forth the 'effort' to transform me. Yes, God is omnipotent and this is not work for him, but it still amazes me that God even bothers with us. As I write this it all seems so basic, like something that I learned in junior high Sunday school. But I suppose that we all need to re-learn and internalize those lessons that were once just memorized information.
This internalization seems so key to any education or development of thought. I remember being on a retreat in high school and the counselor was trying to get us to describe attributes of God that we knew by experience. She became frustrated that we all said things like 'God is love' or 'God is kind' because we were missing the heart of what she was aiming at and just repeating common answers. At the time this made no sense and I was almost frustrated that she invalidated our experiences of God's love or kindness. The more I learn and grow, the more I understand her frustration and intentions. There really does seem to be development of thought that cannot be rushed. It seems that it takes maturity (and possibly previous exposure or a significant experience) to understand the depth of many ideas. This requires patience on both the teacher's and the student's part. Although this is easily frustrating, there does seem to be something inherently good in the growth process. It would be very strange for a 12 year old to be able to fully grasp a intricate concept like the incarnation - he would not be able to understand or appreciate all the implications. Even if the 12 year old were aware of the implications, it would be hard to fit them appropriately into an overall picture of the world. I suppose that what I am trying to say is that despite the difficulties and frustrations, it is good that we humans grow and that this is a temporal process. So instead of trying to be what I am not (and fight the fact that I must grow), I should embrace who I am and God's grace for me. So, welcome to my journey, I hope it is interesting or insightful in some way
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